Peaches and coconuts

Do you remember the book about the differences between men and women entitled, "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars?" Well, a few months ago a friend of ours generalized the difference between Americans and French in this way: Americans are peaches, and the French are coconuts. Americans are often portrayed by the French as having a sweet, soft exterior. We're usually casual, friendly, and happy to meet new people. However, on the inside we're hard to really get to know. There's often a stony pit inside that squishy exterior. The French, on the other hand, have their hard shell on the outside. Sure, it's tough to crack, but once you're in, you are in for life. There's a sweetness and a goodness that is waiting to be discovered.

There is definitely a stereotype that Americans have about the French. If you ask around, the usual themes are "rude, snobby, arrogant, cold. I have found the opposite to be true. Sure, we've only been in Lyon a week, and we're still definitely in the honeymoon stage. But my experience is that the French people that I've gotten to know have been some of the nicest, most genuine, and most helpful people that I have ever met.

Take for instance, our host family, the D's. We stayed with them during our first week in France, and their hospitality has been over the top. They have busy and important lives. Yet they have spent countless hours to help us in every way you can imagine. Madame D walked with us to the shopping center and the bus station on our first evening to get us oriented. She then showed us how to navigate the public transportation website. When a bee sting infection of mine worsened, she secured an appointment for me with their family doctor, drove me to his office, and stayed to help with translation. On the day we were to move into the apartment (more about that later), she helped load our 10 suitcases into her van, drove across town with us, and even stayed for several hours to help us clean. I was so humbled -- would I have done the same for a family staying with us in the States? I like to think so, but I'm not sure. This woman has four teenagers of her own, and she stays extremely busy keeping up with their summer activities. Yet she had a seemingly limitless supply of time for us.

Another example is François. He and his Korean-American wife, Yonee, have been champions for us since the day we met them at church last Sunday. We spent a lovely evening at their home for dinner the following evening. François has a business that involves importing and exporting, and he immediately offered to help us navigate the complex details necessary to import our shipping palette. He's made numerous calls on our behalf to different companies to try to get us the best deal on our customs fees. On moving day, Yonee was one of six women who helped me try to clean our very filthy apartment. After about 5 hours with very little to show for it, Yonee said, "Enough! Let's bring in professional help!" She called around and found a crew that could come this week while we're out of town at a missions conference. When I asked about payment, she wouldn't hear anything of it. "C'est normal," she said dismissively, as if this display of generosity occurred typically in France.

I think I'll create a new analogy for the French people we've met. They are neither coconuts nor peaches. They are strawberries; abundantly sweet all the way through.

Strawberry Christians: That's what Jesus wants from us--to give our time and our love to others, to radiate an abundant sweetness where ever we go. 
I chose you and appointed you to go and bear  fruit--fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. This is my command: Love each other. 

John 15: 16-17

First church service and photos

Our first church service here as residents of Lyon also happened to be the last service for the summer months. Like many other businesses and organizations, the ICCL (International Christian Community of Lyon) shuts down during the month of August, since it seems the entire country of France goes en vacances. It was wonderful to worship with old friends and new. I love the diversity and warmth of this tiny international church!

Worshiping God at the ICCL!

Greg leading Communion

Also today I thought I'd take the opportunity to post a few photos of our host family's home. This house was built in what is now a suburb of Lyon the late 1700s. The owners found an early map of the town, and this house was the only building on the map! It's actually two joined residences now; the families share a wall, and their gardens are separated by hedges. (The neighbors are actually part of the original family line.) There is a large wall all around the property. Huge wooden doors open up to a cobblestone entry. The exterior walls drip with ivy. These walls are about 18 inches thick, and keep the air inside fairly cool despite the extremely hot temperatures we've been experiencing lately. We open the doors and windows in the mornings and evenings to let in the breeze, and then close the thick shutters during the daytime to keep the cool air from escaping. The backyard is mostly gravel, adorned with roses and honeysuckle and large trees. Often we've eaten our meals outside under a huge oak. It's really beautiful!

 The house is three stories. This is the view from the backyard.

 Lori and Greg trying to stay cool in the guest room

View of the front courtyard from our guest room. The adjoining house is visible below. 

The backyard where we often dine "alfresco"

Bienvenue en France!

We made it!! Life begins in la belle France. We've actually been here for three days now, and this is the first chance I've had to sit down for a while to write. I just charged my camera, so hopefully I'll be uploading lots of pictures in the next post. For now, here are some of the highlights from our first days in Lyon:

• We're staying with a French family this week, as our apartment signing is not scheduled until the 23rd. We hosted their daughter Camille for a month last year, and now they are hosting us. Their generous hospitality has been a wonderful blessing. Cool evenings spent in their courtyard have refreshed our weary bodies and souls. We have dined alfresco almost every night (our hostess is an amazing cook by the way)! We enjoy lingering long over cups of tea and relaxed conversation. 

• We successfully set up our French bank account. Someone gave us wise advice early on in our journey -- that if we could accomplish one task successfully, then the entire day should be counted as a success! I think we can count our days as "successes" so far. We have also purchased metro cards and a few groceries. We've traveled countless kilometers via bus, metro, tramway, and on foot.

• Lori is doing great. She's ordering her own coffees and snacks in French, and is a pro at navigating the metro. She just needs to find some friends her own age, which won't be a problem once school begins. 

• On Friday, we enjoyed a familiar ritual with some ministry partners: "pizza and movie night!" It was so nice to just chill out and relax in their company after a few long days of traveling and errands. 

• During "down time" I'm enjoying some refreshing quiet times with the Lord. I thank Him for creating such a beautiful country, and I thank Him for placing us here for this season. I depend entirely on Him for my strength and comfort. He is truly here with me -- I can feel it. I pray for the people of Lyon, and I pray for our ministry to bear fruit for the Kingdom. My friends, would you please join me in praying for this city, and for our small part in reaching the lost with the good news of Jesus?

NYC

In less than 24 hours, Greg, Lori and I will be on our flight to Lyon! We've spent the last couple of days on a road trip from NC to Maine. Our last activity before departure will be dropping Lindsey off at summer camp (my parents will fly over with her in August).

This road trip has provided lots of opportunities to create fun family memories. Our first stop was my parents' house in Virginia. We had a great time playing cards and pool, and conversing over cups of coffee. Saying goodbye was sad, but it actually wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, since I know I'll see them again in August.

 I love you, Mom & Dad!

After leaving Mom & Dad's house, we trekked north to New York City. We got there right as the heat wave struck. NYC in 98-degree heat is pretty miserable, but we managed to have a great time anyway. The pictures will tell the story:

Iconic street scenes: A Franciscan church, cabs, and skyscrapers

Central Park. Dr. Who fans might recognize the girls' re-enactments of scenes from the "Angels Take Manhattan" episode. We also enjoyed a free NY Philharmonic concert in the park! (Thankfully, there are many free things to do in NYC -- it makes up for the cost of simply getting around the city.)

Staying cool in the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Van Gogh is my favorite artist, and I wasn't disappointed!

One highlight for me was seeing the 9/11 memorial. Very emotional. The tree is the only one from the original WTC site that survived the blast; a symbol of resilience.

Our trip was a great introduction to big city living. Although central Lyon is only a half-million people, it's very compact, and we'll be living an urban lifestyle. I'm looking forward to traveling on foot and via public transportation, people watching, and daily food shopping.

The next photo journal will be from Lyon!

Keys

Last Thursday we left the rental house we'd called "home" for the past year. As I placed my house key on the kitchen counter, I noticed that I still had several keys left on my key ring. I had no idea what these keys belonged to. I no longer had a car, or a house, or a storage facility, or a safety deposit box, or even a padlock! Somehow over the years I'd collected these keys for various doors and locks, and then when I no longer needed them I evidently just kept them. Those extraneous keys stayed in my purse for a few more days, but this morning I threw them out.

Throwing out those keys seemed to cement the finality of our departure from the United States. Up until now, it hasn't seemed entirely real that we're actually moving overseas. It's been a dream for so long, and now it's finally about to come true. I am incredibly excited, but also a little bit nervous about having a one-way ticket to Lyon -- there is no return flight; there's no going back.

Holding on to useless keys that opened no locks is a silly thing to do, but I think in some small way it symbolizes my desire for safety and security. Here in the United States, everything is comfortable, easy, and routine. I know how to do basically everything I need to do to survive. When I move to France, though, everything will be unfamiliar, difficult, and even scary at times. I'll have to start from scratch, learning everything from where the grocery stores are to opening a French bank account, and a million things in between, all in a language that I'm uncomfortable with.

I really don't like feeling helpless. I don't think many people do. We all like to feel competent and confident. But in anticipating several weeks (or months) of a steep learning curve, I know there will be lots of times when I will feel incompetent. In those times, I need to remind myself why I moved to France in the first place. It's because God called our family to serve him by ministering to people in this country. I need to keep my eyes focused on who Jesus is, and remember that he is sufficient to meet all my needs; that in my weakness, I actually have his strength.

When Jesus asked Peter, one of his disciples, "Who do you say that I am?" Peter answered, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God." Jesus blessed Peter, then went on to say that he would establish his church, and that he'd give Peter the keys to the Kingdom. Wouldn't it be wonderful to have those keys on a key ring?

Saying Goodbye

There are two reasons I haven't posted anything in a while:
#1 - I'm too busy! We've all been running around like crazy wrapping things up in the U.S. Yesterday I spent all day of cleaning the rental house. It was exhausting, but therapeutic. Today the big task is packing up the suitcases. It will be a juggling act to say the least. We'll have to separate everything into two categories: what is needed for our road trip, and what we'll need later in France. Then we'll have to somehow fit everything into the rental car (fortunately we rented a large SUV). It will definitely challenge my organizational skills.
#2 - I'm too sad. I haven't really felt like blogging, because I knew I'd have to deal with what is actually front and center, emotionally speaking. This has been a long period of really difficult goodbyes. First, we said goodbye to Greg's parents and grandmother in Georgia. That was especially tough. Next week it will be my turn to leave my parents. I am not looking forward to that!
     In between cleaning and packing, we've made room for lots of opportunities to say goodbye to friends. We've made great friends in this area over the years, from neighborhood friends to church friends to school friends. Some of our closest friends came from the homeschool community. We have been a part of a wonderful Classical Conversations community for eight years, and it has become like family to us.
     The girls have had one sleepover after another with their besties. Each one has been bittersweet, because they've definitely had fun, but at the end of every sleepover it was time to say farewell for good. I believe that many of these girls will remain life-long friends, but it still hurts. Each of my daughters handles it differently. One is stoic and steady. She looks to the future, and realizes that she'll see her friends again someday. The other one wears her heart on her sleeve and feels the present pain. She squeezes her friends so tightly that they probably can't breathe. This daughter has shed many tears this week.
     One of the most difficult goodbyes is coming tonight. We're all dreading this one: our sweet dog is going to a new home. Again, this is bittersweet, because we could not have found a better situation for her. She's going to a great couple who really want her. But in a way this is like sending away one of our children. We've had this dog for almost 10 years, and she's like every dog should be: loyal, happy, and comforting. She's part of the family and will be missed.

     We've known all along that saying goodbye would be a part of the journey. Yes, we knew it was coming, but that hasn't made it easier. Although we got some great training from ReachGlobal about how to say "good" goodbyes, each parting has still been painful. What encourages me is looking to the future. With each goodbye, there will certainly be a new "hello." I will make new friends. So will Greg. So will Lori and Lindsey. We'll have a new church family, and the girls will make new friends at school. These friends won't replace the old; they will expand our community and enrich our lives.
     I'm reminded of what Jesus said to his disciples about leaving everything and everyone behind for the sake of the gospel: "Truly I say to you, there is no one who has left house or wife or brothers or parents or children, for the sake of the kingdom of God, who will not receive many times as much at this time and in the age to come, eternal life." (Luke 18:29-30). In God's family, goodbye is never forever!
   

Apartment!

Great news! We finally got word that we've been approved to rent an apartment in Lyon! We chose this apartment based on reports and photos from several friends who went to check it out for us. As you can imagine, it's a little strange and somewhat scary to rent an apartment sight unseen! You can read about that process on my previous post, House Hunting Internationally.

On our limited budget, we knew we wouldn't get everything we wanted, but this place met the most important of our "wish list" criteria:

1) Ideal location. It's in one of Lyon's most sought-after arrondissements, especially for ex-pats. The area is safe and clean. We will be located near several families who already attend our church community, and it should be a good place to meet other English speakers.

2) Close to a metro. We plan to use public transportation for the majority of our travel within the city. Lyon has an excellent public trans system of metros and buses. It's very reliable -- unless there is a strike, which happens from time to time.

3) Large rooms. I know this sounds "American", but we really wanted spacious bedrooms. The rooms in most other apartments we looked at would fit just a bed -- and a small one at that. My husband is 6' 8" (almost 2 meters tall), and so we consider space to be a practical matter! Our apartment has two bedrooms, but they are enormous for European standards. The girls will have plenty of room to share.

4) Storage. Americans are used to having huge walk-in closets as well as attics and garages, but many European apartments have little or no storage space. We were prepared for this, so the storage space in this apartment is a big plus! There are built-in closets and cupboards throughout, and even a "cave" underneath the apartment for extra storage.

 A cupboard in the kitchen! 

Storage space underneath the building. Looks a little scary!

5) Beautiful exterior. OK, this is just a bonus. Obviously we didn't need to have a building that was pretty from the outside. But when I dreamed about living in France, this is exactly the view that I imagined. According to the agency website, the building was constructed in 1950, but it looks much older. As one of my friends wrote, it is "chic, classic, bourgeois French." I love the wrought-iron balcony and decorative moulding. I can just imagine walking up to this building, opening the heavy wooden door between the ground floor shops, walking up the curved staircase, and knowing I am finally HOME!

Bastille Day!

Just a quick note to share a funny story. We were shopping at Trader Joe's tonight, and our 11 year old daughter Lindsey saw some Fourth of July bunting. "Look, Dad," she blurted out, "they decorated for Bastille Day!" Obviously, our daughter is already embracing the French holidays. Bastille Day, commemorating the storming of the Bastille in Paris during the French Revolution, is celebrated in France on July 14. The French flag is made up of equal portions of red, white, and blue, so the tri-paneled bunting made perfect sense to her. (Plus, there was a display of French cheeses right nearby!)

This week will be a whirlwind of packing, goodbyes, and last-minute preparations, so the blog posts will be short and sweet. I'm really looking forward to being able to post pictures of our beautiful new city soon.
Lord willing, we'll arrive on French soil July 18!